Posts by Nathaniel Cilley
Dating is hard enough already! We’re approaching almost a year of being in a global pandemic, and the stakes have gotten worse for us single people out there. It isn’t easy knowing where to draw the line between keeping ourselves and others safe while responsibly balancing a social life. It’s frustrating to find ways to…Read More
Facts vs Feelings
Have you ever gotten a gut feeling about something? You just felt like something was up, but you couldn’t quite put your finger on it? Using emotions to justify beliefs happens quite often, and it’s referred to as Emotional Reasoning. Emotional Reasoning is when we use our feelings to validate our thoughts rather than data.…Read More
Why Facts Don’t Change Our Minds
To put it simply, we are herd animals by nature. We thrive in tribes, and for most of our evolutionary history, we’ve existed in them. When excommunicated from a tribe, it resulted most certainly in death. The threat of being rejected by others is a real fear among many of us even today. It’s much…Read More
In the English language, the word acceptance we often misconstrue with approving of or liking something. In Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), we hold that acceptance means acknowledging reality rather than agreeing with it. By accepting what is, we recognize the reality of the situation and how we’d prefer our body to be, but that…Read More
Self-Leadership During A Public Crisis
Written by Deepak Kashyap Whom do I blame? The employer who fired me because of COVID-19, the Chinese government that allegedly hid this from all of us long enough, my country who was too slow to respond to the situation, the unemployment insurance that wouldn’t kick in soon enough, the unpleasant individuals I am cooped…Read More
Why Do People Catfish?
Catfishing is a new dilemma with online dating. It’s really hard to know who we’re talking to online this day and age. Especially when we’re sheltered in place and unable to meet people as easily and organically face-to-face. Although online dating has allowed making a connection simpler for those of us who can’t find the…Read More
Are You A Perfectionist?
We tend to think that if we set high standards for ourselves it’ll make us more ambitious and successful in going for what we want. The reality is quite the contrary. Perfectionism causes us to beat ourselves up regularly making it harder to achieve our goals. This inflexible mindset results in us feeling miserable while…Read More
It’s really hard to make a change in our lives. After working with clients in helping them change their mindset so they feel ready to take the plunge and face their fears, they often come back to the following session with disappointment in their eyes. For example, they express how upset they were with themselves…Read More
Be Your Own Best Friend
Life is really tough! Sometimes, it can feel unbearable. During the trying and turbulent times, it’s really easy to be hard on ourselves. Especially when this kind of hurtful self-talk is something we’re used to doing. Beating ourselves up can often feel productive and even helpful as if not accepting the mistakes we make and…Read More
Post-Holiday Survival, Now What?
The holidays can be a trying time for most of us. After all, it’s very difficult to be taken out of our familiar surroundings, placed in a confined space with limited areas to escape to, and have family members from all over crammed into the same tight living quarters. What used to be a two-bedroom…Read More